Thursday, June 2, 2011

At a loss for words. Yes...it's me.

Words, I just can’t seem to find the right ones these days. I personally find words incredibly important and I try to use them carefully. They shape your character; build people up, cut you to the core and transform beauty into something tangible. One day, our daughter will read this blog and she’ll be able to hear our uncensored thoughts and prayers for her. Why she’s been in our hearts and dreams since the beginning, the love of her brothers and the hard work and courageousness of her birthmother. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 13:3 that “careful words make for a careful life”. How amazingly careful we need to be, not just with our words, but our actions.
Chris and I, as well as my sisters and a few friends, have been working on our “lifebook” that will be sent to the agency for birthmothers to look through. This will be their peek into our family’s life and their first experience with us as a family. Included in the lifebook is a letter, from us. A letter telling her why we should be her daughter’s parents. How do I do that? Normally, I can bust our songs, papers, blog posts pretty quickly and if it takes over 10 min or so they’re usually really bad. Unfortunately, every time I start the letter I get stuck at the same part, Dear “blank” Yup…that’s basically all I’ve got.  I just don’t have the words. It’s almost like I had them but when I begin to write, they start to disappear into the place that holds all of my sock matches. I know that one night, I’m sure at two in the morning, it’ll come to me and I’ll pop out of bed like I did in college writing songs, and grab my journal and pen and begin to write. So, for now, we’ll be praying for the right words. Careful words of encouragement, courage, health, promise and mostly love. I’d like to thank my friend Jen for sharing her “birthmother letter” with me today. It’s pretty special to read something so sincere, hopeful, uplifting and encouraging. I hope our letter expresses how careful we’ll be with our sweet daughter.

1 comment:

  1. You are MORE than welcome dear. I loved reading my birthmother letter again. Made me have chills.....and remember the anxiety I felt writing....wondering how do you ask someone for their child? how do you truly insure them you will love their child unconditionally? I remember being so angry at God for not allowing me to conceive for all the years we tried and now I look at my two amazing sons and thank God for those unanswered prayers! Much love to you and your family in your journey of adoption. It is truly a wonderful experience. So blessed to have crossed paths with you and experience your journey with you. xoxox

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